The fact that you are reading these words proves the cliché in my title is true.
When Everything Is Stripped Away
Maybe some people skate through this life with just a few scratches, but others–such as you and me–carry deep, often infected, wounds from heartbreak, failure, illness, or death. Experiences we never expected knock us down, strip away what we thought was our life and identity . . .
All bear the common ache of loss and can leave us feeling isolated.
Everything that used to matter no longer exists, or it looks shallow and false.
My Loss: My Son
I know about pain, and that’s why I’m here. My son Jacob suffered in silence for years and then took his life in 2017, and only now can I begin to muster the strength to write about it. Maybe these words can bridge the space between and build us back together in a new, authentic way.
What’s Different Here
As I launch this website and blog, I intend to speak candidly about suicide loss and its aftermath–guilt, grief, blame, depression, hopelessness, and fear. Although I choose not to publish images of myself and my son, I will give you the truth as I know it. I will not/cannot sugarcoat the reality of loss or make such vain pronouncements as, “Everything happens for a reason,” and “They’re in a better place now.”
If you know about loss, then this blog is for you. If you need support, check out our Resources page. If you struggle to accept and learn, survive and maybe even evolve from your pain, then stay with me as I walk through this nightmare with you.
Not Perfect, but Possible
It’s when we hurt the most that it’s the most difficult to get out of bed, leave the house, look up from the grocery cart, or walk to the park.
But when you can rally yourself to do that, you’ll find a gentle person in your home or office, a smile at the store or on the hiking trail, and you will know at a cellular level that despite everything that is real and true and broken, you are not alone.